You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...