I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.