he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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