You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
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the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
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