I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
