i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina just recognized that song.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize