Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
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