don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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