Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
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