who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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