Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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