is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I've blown a few things in my day
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize
