i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
my poor anus
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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