Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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