terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize