We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
