White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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