My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
