"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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