I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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