Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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