Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
they need to just BURY HIM!
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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