we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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