i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
