I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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