I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
