Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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