I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
no you cant smoke seaweed
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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