Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
