So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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