You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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