we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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