quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
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