oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
