At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
