he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize