The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
is wine microwaveable?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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