it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
