Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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