ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
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