would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Randomize
