just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
My vagina is officially offended.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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