I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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