You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
