This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I'm sobbing to NWA
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I would fuck him just for his dog
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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