My nipple is on Facebook.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize