I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize