Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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