My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Randomize
