Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
