I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Come see our sink grown plant.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
